Dame Fortune Laughs
by Ukyou Kuonji
Summary: With Keiichi gone, Toshiyuki Aoshima thinks Fortune has smiled on him: now he has a chance at Belldandy!


This story's a little different, and maybe a little dark... I dunno.  
  
Anyway, all the characters belong to Kosuke Fujishima this time, and   
no offense is intended.  
  
Thanks to everybody at the FFML for their comments and support.  
Hope y'all enjoy this change of pace...  
  
***  
  
DAME FORTUNE LAUGHS  
an Ah! My Goddess fanfiction  
by Ukyou Kuonji  
  
***  
  
Toshiyuki Aoshima inspected his reflection in a storefront mirror.   
Tie straightened, jacket adjusted, every hair in place; yes, he was   
ready. His suit was dark, in keeping with the circumstances, but   
not so much so that it looked like he was going to another funeral.   
If all worked according to plan, this was to be a date, not a dirge.  
  
Keiichi Morisato had been a worthy rival. An honest, upstanding chap,   
if a little possessive of his woman -- of course, who was Aoshima to   
talk about such things as possessiveness? Certainly, he had done   
everything in his power to wrest the glorious Belldandy from his   
rival's clutches, all to no avail. Indeed, he noted to his   
irritation, some of his plans merely served to drive the girl   
closer to 'her Keiichi.' Even more annoying to some extent,   
Belldandy's affections toward Morisato had begun to intrigue his   
cousin Sayoko, and propel *her* towards him. What did Sayoko see   
in that little pipsqueak? Actually, Toshi didn't think she saw   
anything in him at all, but if such a creature as Belldandy thought   
him worthy of her, there had to be something to him, and Sayoko   
*would* find out what it was. In that, she became an ally: the   
idea was that eventually she would take Keiichi, and he would have   
Belldandy to himself.  
  
A fortnight ago, all that changed.  
  
***  
  
No one would have anticipated it to end this way -- even the gods   
may have been taken by surprise. After all, it seemed at times   
as if Morisato was indestructible. Certainly, with Belldandy at   
his side, he lived a charmed life, impervious to trials divine or   
diabolic.  
  
But apart from her, Keiichi Morisato was as vulnerable as any other   
mortal.  
  
It was late on a Saturday night. According to the police reports,   
his motorcycle was sideswiped by car being driven by some drunken   
salaryman on his way home to the exurbs after a long bender with   
some business cronies. The jolt caused him to lose control of the   
bike and fly off the bridge they were on into a culvert.  
  
Toshiyuki shuddered at the thought. The seconds of cartwheeling   
horror as the bike drove off into midair, the realization that there   
was no power in heaven or on earth there to come to his rescue, the   
impact onto the stubborn concrete below. A horrible way to go.  
  
After a long pasue, Aoshima shrugged. Well, were there any   
*pleasant* ways to die, after all?  
  
***  
  
He was sorry that things happened this way. In his efforts to   
sabotage Belldandy and Keiichi's relationship, he was more than   
willing to do things like draining Morisato's gas tank so that   
*he* could drive off with Belldandy, but deeds like, say, cutting   
a brake line, were far beyond the pale for him. Physical harm was   
not his style. And it was as much a relief to him as everybody   
else concerned when the drunk driver was apprehended. Some people   
were starting to talk... accusing *him*, of all people, of setting   
the accident up! Well, he couldn't deny that Dame Fortune had   
smiled down upon him by removing Morisato from the picture.  
  
Drunkenness is taken a little more in stride in Japan; it's the   
salarymen's safety valve, after all. But an outraged NIT student   
body demanded justice, and Aoshima even went so far as to hire   
lawyers to argue for a severe sentance for the guilty party. It   
took the gossips by surprise, and even Belldandy and her sisters   
seemed impressed by his dedication to the cause. It gave him hope.  
  
***  
  
As he approached the gate of the temple grounds that Belldandy and   
her sisters called home, his mind drifted back to the funeral. He   
had borne some of the cost of that, too; partly to make amends for   
the grief he'd caused Morisato in life, partly to continue to quash   
the rumor mill, and partly for Belldandy's sake. During the ceremony,   
however, he had decided to keep a reasonable distance between himself   
and Belldandy, who was sobbing on Urd's shoulder. This was just not   
the time for thos sorts of thoughts. Besides, Sayoko needed attending   
to...  
  
She was thoroughly distraught. And somewhat drunk. And -- most   
curious -- enraged at him. "I s'pose yer happy now, arrrntcha?"  
  
He maintained a flat expression. "Should I be?"  
  
Sayoko wobbled and thumped her chest, as if trying to release   
something. "Ooooh yeah. He's gone for good, so she's alll yers, hmm?   
Go ferr it, tiger, why dontcha?"  
  
Toshiyuki closed his eyes and sighed as he sat down next to his   
cousin. "Look, Sayoko. I'm really sorry about this, okay? I don't   
know what to tell you. Yeah, I guess I'm in luck, but this isn't   
what I had in mind when I wanted to catch her on the rebound. He   
departs this way, and he's a martyr... she'll never get over him,   
she'll practically deify him. I don't think I could compete with   
that."  
  
Sayoko dragged herself out of her chair and levelled an accusing finger   
at him. "You couldn't compete with him when he was alive, Toshi! He   
was too good, too sweet for this world. I wasn't worthy of him, and   
you... you think you're worthy of the one person who was? Well, I've   
got news for you, buster..."  
  
Toshiyuki stood up and clamped his hand over his cousin's mouth. "Cut   
it out, willya? This is a funeral, for Kami's sake! A little respect   
for the dead, if you don't mind..."  
  
His hand was batted away. "Respect for the dead? *You're* asking   
*me* to have respect for the dead? Look at her, Toshi..." and she   
pointed at the three sisters. "I *know* what you're thinking about   
right now, and I'm pretty sure that's not very respectful of the dead!"   
She turned on her heel and stalked out as best she could, given her   
condition. Actually, she was quite wobbly.  
  
Toshiyuki hurried after her. "Sayoko, please, let me drive you home.   
You won't remember a thing of this in the morning. Believe me."  
  
***  
  
Indeed, the incident did seem to have been forgotten, and after two weeks   
had passed, Toshiyuki Aoshima decided the time was ripe.  
  
"What do you think, Sayoko? Have I given her enough time to recover?"  
  
"Toshi,what do *you* think? *I* haven't recovered, and he wasn't even   
mine." Sayoko's face was somewhat grim.  
  
"Yeah, well, I imagine she needs some comfort beyond that which her   
sisters can give her. You know what they say about widows..."  
  
"No, what *do* they say?"  
  
"Ah..." Aoshima's mind went blank. He couldn't think of a single   
epigram. "Well, you know, they have certain... needs, after all.   
They're accustomed to... various activities that his, er... absence   
deprives them of."  
  
A wan smile began to creep over the grey mask. "And what makes you   
think she and Morisato ever...?"  
  
"Well, she's familiar with love hotels, that much I know."  
  
Sayoko's eyes went wide. "No kidding? How d'ya know that?"  
  
"Well... I took her to one once, and she understood where she was, and   
I think what was expected..."  
  
"Get out! *You* took her to a love hotel? No *wonder* you think you   
have a shot at her!" Sayoko leaned forward. "What happened there?"  
  
"Uh..." Toshiyuki scratched the back of his head. "It's a difficult   
story to tell... I think she threw me out."  
  
Sayoko facefaulted. "You haven't got a *prayer*, Tosh'."  
  
Aoshima drew himself up defiantly. "Well, I'm going, anyway."  
  
"Whatever. Good luck, I guess."  
  
***  
  
The sun shone cheerily as he crossed the temple courtyard. Yes, it   
looked as if through all these disastrous events of the past couple   
of weeks, fortune was finally smiling down on him. Maybe she would   
give him a tumble. Maybe she would actually like him. Maybe...  
  
Maybe she would answer the door.  
  
Toshiyuki stood there, tapping his foot impatiently, checking his   
bouquet to make sure it hadn't wilted yet. Finally, he could make   
out a tall shadow approaching the door, followed by a shorter figure.   
his gaze narrowed: could it be? Could Morisato's amazing luck have   
allowed him to even cheat death?  
  
He shook himself slightly as Urd shunted the door open. Oh, and that   
was Skuld following behind. His imagination had been running away with   
him again. He placed his hand to his forehead in disgust at himself.  
  
With his hand over his face, neither of the two sisters recognized him   
right away. "Can I help you?" asked Urd.  
  
Her voice, smooth as satin, calmed his agitation, and he dropped his   
hand and lifted his face. "Here goes nothing... "Is Miss Belldandy   
in?"  
  
A pained and irritated look crossed Urd's face. "Oh... it's you. Go   
away, little man."  
  
"Yeah! Belldandy's gone!" Skuld chimed in, and she looked as if she   
was about to cry.  
  
What? Toshiyuki Aoshima was not about to be dismissed so easily.   
Not when the prize was so nearly in his grasp. "Oh, she's here all   
right..." He walked into the temple, right between the two sisters.   
"I can tell..." He sniffed the air. "She can't have left; I know her   
scent, and the trail ends here." He put his hand to the door of what   
he believed to be Belldandy's room. But before he shunted the door   
open, he turned to face Urd and Skuld.  
  
"I'm really terribly sorry about this intrusion, ladies... But I really   
must speak with Miss Belldandy."  
  
Urd shook her head. "You won't find her in there."  
  
Aoshima faced her, defiant, his hand still on the door. "This *is*   
her room..."  
  
Urd nodded.  
  
"And she just walked in here not too long ago... I can tell."  
  
Urd cocked her head, surprised at his perception. "That's true, but..."  
  
"Fine, then." And he turned to the door, opened it, and stepped into,,,  
an empty room. A number of boxes of memorabilia had been piled up   
into a corner, and a mirror hung on the opposite wall, but apart from   
that, the room was completely bare.  
  
"B-b-but... where...?"  
  
Urd walked over to him, and laid a hand on his shoulder. "She's gone   
home, little man."  
  
"Home?" He knew the three girls were gaijin, but their native land   
was just one of the mysteries about them he had not yet been able to   
ascertain. "Where's that?"  
  
The older girl rolled her eyes, with an expression of 'you-don't-get-  
it-do-you' "No, she's gone home... to be with Keiichi. Home to be with   
our Father."  
  
The phrase sounded vaguely Christian, like a Western euphemism for...  
no!  
  
Toshiyuki Aoshima's eyes glazed over, and he staggered from the temple   
grounds, grief-stricken. Somewhere in the distance, he heard the   
mocking laughter of a woman, a cross perhaps between Sayoko and Urd.   
It must be Dame Fortune herself, he thought to himself, as he ran   
desperately into the night.  
  
*****  
  
sigh  
  
Comments and criticism are welcomed, nay, begged for. Please send to:  
  
ukyoukwnji@aol.com  
  
Until next time, I am yours.  
  
Itsu mo,  
Ucchan  
  
  



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